25 Years Too Late...

25 Years Too Late...

Thursday, 30 April 1987

April Skies


My No.1: ‘April Skies’ – The Jesus And Mary Chain






Today was another get drunk in The Walks day.



This time it was Roger, Gillian, Libby and me, and it was a ‘birrovalrf’.  I suppose.







[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘Greater circles…

Wednesday, 29 April 1987

Arf-arf-arf!


‘Butcher Baby’ – Plasmatics






Today was okay, I think.  Sonia came to Tech, asking me for her bangle back.  I lied and told her I didn’t have it.  Arf-arf-arf!  Libby gave me a set of headphones for my personal stereo.  I’m chuffed with that.















[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘April Skies

Tuesday, 28 April 1987

Fooking Ess


‘Happy Place’ – The Jesus and Mary Chain





Today was jolly.  Again, I got talking to Ruth Barton who goes on my bus and decided she was gorgeous, too. 



By the way, this was the 2nd sunny day in which my hair was backcombed and ‘spiked’ very, very, very high.  And it was ‘fooking ess’; more ‘fooking ess’-er than ever before.  No shit, man!



My personal stereo became one of my best mates today, as I listened to it loads.  It’s a companion that I don’t intend to lose.






Once again, a trip to The Walks for a piss-up session, only this time it was just Gillian, Roger, Kevin and me.  And it was a bit of a laugh.




Then I came back to Wisbech early, cos I had to go to the Dentist.  In the waiting room, I started a letter to Flash and wrote:

               

Here I am.  At the Dentist’s.  Listening to my PS and hoping he’s not gonna remove half of my face, cos my image is great now…



The Dentist gave me a temporary filling, and I’ve got to go back for a real checkaround on MAY 19.



‘Be My Dynamo’ – Bill Nelson




Tonight, I gave the first broadcast of a BTC tape to a live audience.  This was at the Angles Theatre just before Trianglia.  Me ‘n’ some of the kids listened to mine and Flash’s Never Mind The Goolies – Here’s The Situation cassette.



Also, on the way home, I got chatting to two girls called Carrie and Sue who were really nice!







[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘Arf-arf-arf!

Monday, 27 April 1987

New Era?


‘Width of a Circle’ – David Bowie





Yesterday’s entry ended nicely, with a happy completeness and a sense of optimistic fulfilment.  I almost felt that that was how I should end my diary.  But I can’t keep myself away from you, folks, so here I am!  Hasn’t been long, has it?  But let’s just say we’re into a ‘New Era’.  Just for the laugh, okay?



I don’t know if I mentioned it – I guess I did – but I had shit toothache all last week and today it is still bad.



I got to Tech and everyone was very pretty and beautiful.  I got talking to Saskia again and decided she was gorgeous.  I have known I fancy her for a while now.  Couldn’t stop talking about her, thinking about her that night at Roger’s when we consoled ourselves over beans on toast after that shit night at The Ship.  I think we are friends again.  I saw Anna, from a distance, and we haven’t spoken at all, but her friend Linda was nice to me this week.



Roger slowly continues to get a bit schizo socially.  One minute – i.e. when he’s with Gillian, his new girlfriend – he can be really sarky, piss-taking and unsociable, like he’s trying to make himself look good at the expense of others, which is a lot like Nyall, and the next minute he’s okay.




Anyhoy, Roger, Gillian, Solomon, Holly, Libby and I went to The Walks and got willy babbered (i.e. ‘pissed’ to all you spastics).







[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘Fooking ess…

Sunday, 26 April 1987

Willy Babbered


‘Happy Place’ – The Jesus and Mary Chain


I feel good.  Toothache’s still here, but inside, I feel great.



I hope it stays sunny tomorrow.



FIEND



By the way, the Jesus and Mary Chain are brilliant and I don’t hate ‘Some Candy Talking’ any more.  I think it’s ace.  I haven’t got many J+MC trax…





College tomorrow.  How shit!



Later:

AFTERNOON



‘Cut Dead’ – The Jesus and Mary Chain





Man!  I’ve just bought some new black jeans and they are skiiiin-tight!  Brilliant!



Later:



Facing up to murdered love is all I’ve got in a happy world.  Seeing you just pass me by has put me in a slowing phase.  I don’t know if you still love me.  Do you love me any more?  Six months can feel like a long time when you’re rather young.



My soul is yours.  Don’t throw it away.  My heart is fresh for you.  Don’t turn your head to your chest in dismay.



Sitting in this frightened haze, I have no pictures of your face.  We haven’t spoken for a year.  Have you forgotten who I am?



Later:



MANY LIPS HAVE KISSED THIS MOUTH, BUT YOURS WERE UNEQUALLED.  WHAT DID I DO TO HURT YOU?  YOU’RE KEEPING A DISTANCE, BUT YOU’RE VERY PRECIOUS.  TO ME.



THRU THESE GOGZ THE WORLD AIN’T PRETTY.



Later:



‘Happy the Man’ – The Cure





This month, I became much more of a rebellious little git.  Obnoxious even seemed to be my desired destination.  But that fire has not burned long, thankfully.  But I did begin to put myself before all others for quite a while.  Looking back, I’ve been a scruffy docile wreck.  Read my entries for April.  Well out of it.  And full of the word ‘fuckin’’.  Most of my entries seem to have been written whilst pissed this month.



But when I saw Flash, we both felt a lot better about our recent troubles.  And we felt bliss and holy joy as we got pissed to the news that my brother Chip had been born.  And, crikey me, is he cute or what?



Later:

EVENING



‘Mask’ – Bauhaus





And so.  The Easter ‘Holiday’ ends, slowly, but as they say in cliché land, surely.  The new college term is looming.  And all I can think about now is the good time I had over that ‘four’ days at Flash’s.  But I have also tasted work, and the fruits to be gained from my labour, which now makes me wonder: Do I care if I get chucked out of college?  Money and security are good things.






The Material Fruits Of The Last Two Weeks: 2 pairs of tight black jeans, one red/black shirt, ASF 12-inch, GD 12-inch, ZM 12-inch, J+MC doublepack, recordings of my ‘roots’ music from Paul, a pair of black shades, and othersuch.



The Soundtrack Was Brought To You By: ASF, Xmal Deutschland, Gene Loves Jezebel, Zodiac Motel, Ghost Dance, Al Stewart, King Crimson and The Jesus and Mary Chain.



I wonder if Andy’s got me an ASF record?



'The Exploding Boy' – The Cure




Soon be half term.  I hope I can stay at Flash’s then.  And I hope he goes to Peterboro’ for that weekend with his dad, then I can meet up with him.  Me ‘n’ Flash, we are the Vibe Brothers.  Both of us are ZOMO fans.  And I hope no one down here hears of ‘em.  Ever!  I want them to remain ours and ours alone.  And in my heart of hearts, I hope Flash and Dodo’ll get back together again if that’s what they truly want.



I know BMW and I never shall.



Just contact me, Miranda.  Just to talk, to be friends.  Please.



‘Let’s Spend the Night Together’ – David Bowie





I feel good rite now, y’know.  College is just going to bring me down.  Before, it was a happy place.  Now, it is shit.



OH GOD!  What will Anna say when she sees me?!  GUUULP!



Nothing, I bet.



I bet everybody tries to be bastards to me. 



For some reason, I bet David’s dyed his hair blond.  I wonder if he has?  Shit twat!



I hope there’s a Tech Disco soon.



CONDOLENCES: Alison’s dad died last week.  I feel a lot of sympathy for Alison.  I wish her the strength and fitness to survive what can only be a traumatic experience.  She has my heart.



I want some new headphones for my personal stereo.  And I want some Japanese slip-on shoes.  I almost got some, but they didn’t have any in a size 11.  Will I fit into a 10?!



Flash is great, you know.  He really gave me the time of my life on that last visit.  We attained something we had both been missing for a long time.  A long, long time.  I don’t think we’d experienced such happiness together since the Summer of ’86.  And when it finally came again, last weekend, in Norwood and othersuch places, we were reborn.  We became the VIBE BROTHERS, getting drunk and having a laugh.



Getting in with Paul was ace.  Paul is ace.  And my Dad is ace.  And Annie is ace.  And I don’t think Gerry, Flash ’s mum, deserves all the trouble she’s having.  Wazzer was a good kid, too.  And then there are the three girls who mean so much: Dodo, Manda and Beatrice Miranda Wasp.  I hope Flash gets back with either Dodo or Manda, whichever one’s best for him emotionally. 



Dodo and me: a foolhardy venture, built on thrills and misinterpration.  I was a fool and a traitor.  I was seduced by my own desires and a lust that I selfishly wished to see fulfilled.  Honestly?  I don’t know why I did it.  I guess because she told me she was interested and because I could.  But Flash and Dodo were always going to be marred by Dodo’s inability to care for him – that’s why they agreed to split before the whole thing blew itself out of proportion.  They would have finished regardless of my involvement.  Not that I get off the hook like that.  [I have spent 11 years apologising to Flash, and he has been nothing but gracious – Ritch, 1998]  And Manda and Flash was a badly timed and misfortunate heartache.  What they had, should have grown, but it could not.  BMW and myself were brought to our end by an emotionally shizophrenic mistake.  The night I finished with her over the telephone should never have come.  It should never have occurred.  Never.  It’s easy to say ‘Never look back!’ but so difficult to do.



‘Bo Diddley Is Jesus’ – Jesus and Mary Chain





I’m glad I went to work now, because my ‘independence’ allowed me to enjoy the Yorkshire visit more.  But Flash is my life.  He is my VI-BRO (gossip! scandal!).  I loved my time at his home.



Now to conquer BMW’s friendship…



With an open heart and an open mind, I retire to bed.


'ME SONG AIN'T WITTY, NO...'



END







[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘April considered…

Saturday, 25 April 1987

My Teeth Kill


It’s 2.15am.



‘Caislean Oir’ – Clannad





Me teeth are killing me.  I’ve had loads o’ tablets an’ they ain’t done nowt.  I think I’ve already had too many, but I’m having some more and I’m off to bed.  I thought I’d better tell you, in case it kills me. 



Goodbye…



Later:

11pm.



‘Moonchild’ – King Crimson





No.  I’m alive, but I’m probably dying cos of the amount of pain killers I’ve taken during today.



Yes.  Last nite was sleepless and awful.  Cos o’ my bastard tooths.  When I did sleep, I dreamt about Monica Roseman.  I wish she’d contact me.  I want to help her.  I hope she’s okay. 



I eventually got up at 9.45am, and a letter from Flash had arrived.  He’s written to BMW, telling her she’d better get in touch with me or everyone will die. 



Right. 



He wants me to write to Dodo to tell her to get in touch with him.  Okay.  I will.



‘Wishing Well’ – Free





In town, I felt ace, like my image had pulled a real fast one on the rest of the universe.  My hair was ‘fooking ess’ and my new black/red shirt looks ace.  I met Sophie at 2pm and she’d brought along her 3 year old nephew, William.  He was a bloody handful, I can tell you.  Sophie’s really changed, and she told me I have as well.  She seems much more maternal now, but wants a sex change so she can take up a professional football career.  It seems we have drifted a little, but we all change.  And I’m changing even now, becoming a better-dressed person.  I talked to her about BMW, and, as they go to the same school, she’s going to tell BMW to write to me.  I bet you BMW won’t even make an effort.  Sophie told me that BMW and Mark are now a ‘school joke’ as Mark never mixes with his mates now and BMW never mixes with hers.  They are always together, just the two of them, all over each other. 



‘Head over heels,’ said Sophie.



Still, I enjoyed Sophie’s company.  I expect she hated mine, cos I was in complete agony all day due to my bloody toothache.



She says she’ll ring me in the week.



SEX



‘In The Rain (Session)’ – Jesus and Mary Chain





In town, I bought the new J+MC 7-inch double pack of ‘April Skies’


…and some black shades.  I also ordered the ‘Sunshine Miner’ 12-inch by Zodiac Motel from Fourth Dimension.  It should arrive by next Saturday.  And hopefully, Andy, who works at Freddie’s yard, went to Peterborough today.  He told me that if he did, he’d get me an Alien Sex Fiend record if I gave him the money (which I did).  Hope he has!



Tomorrow, I’ll buy some new tight black jeans.  Again.



I’ve spent the rest of the afternoon in bed, due to my lack of sleep last nite.  It also soothed my mind and helped me ignore my toothache.



Time for bed proper now.



God.  My teeth kill.







[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘April considered…

Friday, 24 April 1987

Toothache and Bad Hair

‘Can the Can’ – Ghost Dance





‘Jesus’ by Jez(uz):




Last nite, I had the shittest experience I’ve ever had in bed: a fuckin’ shit toothache, which fucked me off totally.



It’s lasted all today ‘n’ all…



DREAM: Being in the living room with loads of mates – and MARK DALTON!  I was pissed off cos Betty had invited everyone, including him, so I had a go at her and left the house in favour of a wander around The Walks in King’s Lynn with Keir my next door neighbour.



Shit dream, eh?



ALIEN



‘Touch Me’ – The Doors





My stars say a lot about changes and new happenings.  So do BMW’s, which makes me hope that one day she’ll chuck MD and find me.  Or at least talk to me.  It’s been o’er a year now.  Anyhoy, I’ll see Sophie tomorrow and tell her of my desire to resume communication with the Wasp, who I shall probably see in town.  GACH!



Flash.  Have you written to her yet?! 



Will she ever speak to me again?  I bet too much has changed.  And that’s probably the hardest thing to take.



Write to me, Flash.  Please, please, please.



FUHK!  I HATE TOOTHACHE ‘N’ MY HAIR’S SHIT!







[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘My teeth kill…

Thursday, 23 April 1987

Radar Love


It’s 8.53pm.



My No.1: ‘Radar Love’ – Ghost Dance




I woke up on a mattress on the floor, having dreamt that Flash and I had killed a young girl called Leoni.  As I tried to flee the scene of the crime, my beads snapped and I lost most of them.  I was terrified that the beads would be found and then incriminate me.  So, there I am, waking up from this nightmare, on a mattress next to Flash.  I’m saying to myself, ‘Thank God it was only a dream…’



So what followed seemed very real.



The police came round to inform us – as they were informing all the houses – to be careful because there was an attacker on the loose.  I was shocked by this, thinking it sounded suspiciously like my dream, but so was Flash.  Then, from behind the police, Leoni walked in, holding my lost beads!  But she didn’t accuse us of anything and actually said that the attacker had worn red trousers.  Flash + I were in our usual black…



A lot of questioning, news coverage and man-hunting ensued, until a man who police thought was the rapist was shot.  Meanwhile, I was fighting my conscience, trying to work out why the dream I’d had was real and alive.



Eventually, I was jailed for something or other, with a tramp played by Bernard Cribbins


…who transformed into a gorgeous semi-naked blonde with nice genitals.  We escaped from jail together…



I then woke up, but all the Leoni business had been very realistic and disturbing.  Godogodogodogod, was that an awful dream.  When I woke up I was glad it was all over.



‘Fill Your Heart’ – David Bowie




Bygodmeladd, it’s been a ferooking hot day, I can tell thee.  Yes.  I can tell thee that!  I cairn ‘arf.  I cairn ‘arf tell thee that, y’boz-eed beefburger.



Well.  Let’s go.  Let’s hit the happenings, disco citizens (Yuh do!)!!!



The phone is ringing.  Is it for me?



Waits…



Naw!  Can’t be.




Anyhoy, I bought Smash Hits today and it was q. good for a change, cos it possessed features on The Cure and The Jesus and Mary Chain, plus lotsa piccies of Kim Wilde (more on her later!)…



‘Waterfalls’ – Paul McCartney




Good News:

The Jesus and Mary Chain are releasing a new single!  I expect I shall purchase it.  I also intend buying a new ALIEN SEX FIEND single in the next seven days.



DAVID BOWIE’s new album is out. 


It is very doubtful that I will purchase that.

[Until 1991 – Future Elt]



T REX have released a COLLECTION of a sides/b sides.  A tempting buy.  A double LP, indeed.  Will I buy it or not?



Top of the Pops was fucking crap and The Smiths were bloody shate.  But Kim Wilde!  Oh God!  Oh Buddha!  Horus!  Ra!  Isis!  That cow effort!  Jehovah!  Jesus!  Moses!  That one that looks like an elephant! etc… 



Yes, I know Kim Wilde makes shit records these days, but god, is she beautiful. 


Didn’t used to be this gorgeous, but she is now.  She’s great.



My Top Three Beautiful Women 



1)       Beatrice Miranda Wasp

2)       Kim Wilde

3)       Marilyn Monroe



Others: Bianca White, Elizabeth Taylor, all of Fuzzbox, Anne-Marie from Ghost Dance and many more, I suppose.



Rumour has it that Alison Ford’s dad died last week.  I’m unsure.



Anyhow, that’s all for a bit,

                                                                all my bestest,

                                                                                                Sweetest ‘Jez’(-ebel)…









[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘My teeth kill…

Wednesday, 22 April 1987

Drive My Rocket (Up Uranus)

7.50am.



I think the holidays are easier to handle than Tech.  I didn’t used to.  I also feel quite happy and content right now, but I’m really waiting for Saturday…



Later:



‘Drive My Rocket (Up Uranus)’ – Alien Sex Fiend



This song reminds me of all the fun Flash and I had over the weekend…



So.  Work was okay today.



I’ve been reading my old letters from BMW.  Yes.  I DO still love her.



Does she hate me?



Aren’t Alien Sex Fiend fucking ace, eh? 



Yup!  They is!



Later:



‘Splintered in Her Head’ – The Cure







Tonaeght, Joey did the decent thing.  No, he didn’t top his little self, he rang me and invited me along to The Lattice House in King’s Lynn to see Gary Decan’s new band: Bertie Bassett and the Jelly Babies from Hell.  I declined the offer, cos I looked a scogger, my hair was a mess, I didn’t have time to get ready and Freddie wouldn’t have been able to pick me up afterwards.  I’d like to have gone, but I wouldn’t have felt right.  Nice offer, though…








[Images subject to control of individual Copyright Holders including works originated by Elton Townend Jones, but excluding any images or design attributed to ‘The Situation’ which are copyright of The Situation (see specific acknowledgements in the ‘Thanks to…’ section below) / Based on true events and designed as a study of parochial British cultural and emotional life in the late 20th century, this blog is a work of fiction. Cultural icons excluded, all characters and incidents featured are entirely fictional / This blog is non-profit; all video clips are used for illustrative purposes and always come from YouTube / No copyright infringement is intended – just trying to get things into context. Never forget: no man is an island. If you think anything I’ve used is damaging you in any way, please comment and immediate action will be taken to minimise offence / This notice was amended on 13 July 2011 and is intended to cover this and all posts on www.25yearstoolate.blogspot.com that precede it]



NEXT TIME: ‘Radar love…